As usual I have no pictures taken especially for the blog. Actually, I’ve barely even thought about this blog for a while. My mind has been full, and the world has been a mess, and I’ve not really been coping very well. Parenting is about the only thing that seems to being going well at the moment, and even that has tested me quite a bit recently. Keeping my cool when I have a toddler having a tantrum at the same time as a baby screams isn’t easy, and there have been a few times when I’ve failed. And I’ve yelled. The one type of parent I really really did not want to be is a yeller. But you can’t be calm all of the time. It’s not possible. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with losing your patience every once in a while. I’m just a human.
Thankfully Astrid’s phase of never ending screaming actually does seem to have ended. She’s still very clingy, and will not be held by other people. She will rarely be put down either, meaning everything is such a mess and I’m so disorganised. I remember this feeling of losing control of everything from when Iris was a baby. I expected it but still can’t accept it. Second time around it harder, as Iris deserves my attention too. Astrid has a habit of demanding my full attention just as Iris decides to do something dangerous. Like climb onto the back of the sofa and jump off.
They’re quite a pair. Astrid scans her surroundings constantly looking for Iris, and Iris talks to Astrid in a little cutie voice the way grown ups talk to babies. Sometimes Iris will say things like “baby Astrid is so beautiful” or “I love her baby Astrid” and my heart swells so much I can barely contain it. I have cried. Several times.
I love watching their relationship grow and develop, and I’m looking forward to the days they can play together and chat to each other. They won’t get long to be a twosome before Iris will be heading off to school, so I must remember to fill as many days with opportunities for having fun as I can.