I’m two days late posting this – Astrid is now 16 days old – because it’s just so busy in my world now. There’s no way of preparing for looking after a toddler and a newborn. It’s a total whirlwind. The days go by in the blink of an eye, thanks to not stopping to rest for a second. Then the sleepless nights stretch on forever and I’m relieved when morning comes.
It’s been a tough week, in a good way. With Trevor back at work but mostly working at home, I’ve had to deal with him being right there but too busy to help me. I find myself fighting the urge to ask him for help constantly, but I have to get the hang of this without his help. He will work away from home soon enough, and then he’ll work away overnight. And I will be the only adult responsible for these two tiny girls.
Anyway, back to Astrid.
Wow, she’s amazing. She’s dealing with a rotten cold and a nasty cough and she’s way too small. It just seems so cruel. She’s coughing herself awake and coughing until she’s sick. It’s horrible. I find it painful to see her struggling. Iris has it too, but can have the cough syrup and the Calpol. Astrid is not so lucky. She’s relying on breastmilk alone.
On Friday the midwife and the health visitor turned up at the same time. Astrid was about an ounce away from her birth weight, which seems amazing to me as Iris took so very long to get back to hers. She’s feeding like a champ though. Constantly, actually. It no longer hurts like hell, and I’m starting to enjoy it. She’s alert during some feeds now and stares up into my eyes. It’s magical. I’d forgotten how that felt.
She sleeps a lot. They’re very short periods of sleep, waking frequently day and night for a feed, but she always seems to be asleep. I’d forgotten quite how sleepy newborns are. I don’t remember the point when Iris stopped being so sleepy. It must be pretty early on. They nap together now, all cuddled up. It’s so very very cute.
We’re getting into the swing of things and getting back to normal a bit. I’m actually enjoying this mum of two business a lot more than I thought I would. I was quite stressed out about how I would cope. I now know that I will, even when it gets really really hard. I know that it will get really really hard!