One week with Astrid 

  A whole week has passed by already, which hardly seems possible. It’s been a mixture of keeping busy and being incredibly lazy, and that has suited us perfectly. This time last week we had brought her home, introduced her to Iris, and were settling down for the night. It only seems like yesterday.

Astrid has been fantastic. She even sleeps reasonably well at night for a newborn, and the sleep deprivation has been helped enormously by cosleeping. I know I’ll reach a point where I can doze as she feeds, but I’m not there yet. She’s feeding well, and often. Breastfeeding is going really well despite some early issues. 

Although Astrid was a good weight at birth, nothing seems to fit her! Iris was the same, and we had to buy some tiny baby clothes. They aren’t much use for Astrid though, as Iris was born in June during a heatwave! We’ve bought a few tiny warm baby sleepsuits to get us through until she grows. 

I’m doing ok. I’m sore. My stitches are causing me quite a bit of pain, which surprises me as I had far more stitches last time and no trouble with them at all. I wonder if it’s because I had an episiotomy last time, and tore naturally this time. The after pains of the uterus returning to a smaller size were far worse this time, but thankfully didn’t last long. I’m finding breastfeeding painful too. I’m sure I did with Iris too, but I’d given in and bought nipple shields by this point. I’m determined not to do that again. There’s been some cracking and bleeding, and I’ve got though a lot of Lansinoh! For a whole day yesterday I fed only on one side because I just couldn’t bear it anymore. I expressed from the sore side instead, to keep it from drying up or getting mastitis. Astrid has a really shallow latch and we’re working on her opening her tiny mouth wider! 

I hadn’t forgotten about the exhaustion of the early days, so I knew to expect this feeling. This zombie like inability to function properly. It’s a physical tiredness, from the birth, and a brain fog that prevents you from doing anything well. 

It’s all totally worth it though. The early days are tired bliss. I’m so happy I would pop, if I could find the energy. Trevor was right, of course. I do now make double the amount of love and there’s plenty to go around! 

Astrid, you’re amazing. You can stay. 

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